Apparently I’m not quite as ready to hang up the blog as I had thought.  I doubt that I’ll be posting very often, and it’s likely that many posts will have little to do with knitting.  Some will of course, but knitting is a slow process these days and I don’t get much done nor do I get anything done quickly.

Still, something in me seems to want to continue this digital diary, so I’ll just go with it for now :)

Most of you probably know that I have been dealing with a terminal cancer situation.  Funny thing - most of the physical problems I have stem from side effects of the chemotherapy drugs I’ve been given rather than directly from the cancer.  And there have been a lot of drugs.  As we move down the list they become less effective and have more serious consequences.

During this time, my treatment has been managed by a very good oncologist.  He has been sharp and has organized things ably and quickly when necessary.  He has listened to me - up to and including taking my observations about my condition and research into its treatment into consideration.  He is, in addition to being a good oncologist, a good man.

Yesterday I was informed that my doctor has taken a position in another hospital and will be leaving at the end of September.  I have the option of transferring my treatment to the other hospital or being assigned to another doctor at the one where I’ve been getting my treatment for the last nine years.

Initially I was pretty upset.  It is hard for me to be comfortable with doctors and I felt some resentment that now I would have to deal with a new one.  I could, of course, transfer to the other hospital but it hasn’t had the best of reputations in the past and is not in an area I’m comfortable traveling to.  In addition, I’m familiar and comfortable with the hospital and staff I’ve been seeing all along.  Do I want to pull all that up, as though I were transplanting tomatoes, and go elsewhere - where the doctor would be familiar but everything else would be up in the air?

Finally I realized that this cannot have been an easy decision for my oncologist.  Whatever his reasons are, perhaps it is time for him to move on.  I have had his care for the better part of a decade and am deeply grateful for it.  Maybe it’s a good things that others will get to experience his kindness and expertise.  And maybe there are things I can learn from a new oncologist.  So I think I have decided to stay where I am.  I could change my mind, though I don’t think it likely, and will wish my old oncologist the very best as I try to meet my new oncologist with an open mind and heart.

I do, however, want to give him something a little more personal than a hearty handshake before he leaves so I started an Open Cable Scarf this afternoon.

I was a little nervous about managing the cables because my hands and fingers are about half numb due to neuropathy.  I have become very clumsy :)  To my surprise and pleasure, things didn’t go badly at all and I was able to make good progress.  I’m using Paton’s Classic Merino (which has been discontinued, I understand) and it’s nice and soft.  If I can keep up the pace I managed today, I should be able to finish this in a week.  It doesn’t seem like much, but I hope he will enjoy it.

Jade is pouting in the hall because Myria has been busy and I have had either a keyboard or my knitting in my lap all day.

She’ll live :)